Lessons from coming out of Art Block

It has been a while. After my 31 portraits, I decided to take a sabbatical and rest for a while. I was really getting burnt out. Not only with art, but with a lot of other things. 2020 is just depressing and exhausting.

But somehow, I crawled out of my deep cave and came out with a few paintings. It was tough but I finally managed to break its deep bonds slowly. I had to spend time on my art. My studio needed love. So, I put down the Nintendo Switch, and picked up a pencil and drew.

I hated it. Being rusty, I hated everything that came out of my game addled brain. I did not like how my line art worked, and anatomy? what is that? fortnunately, the classes I taught for children on Saturdays helped jump start my brain and I finally came out with decent work.

I joined pencilvember, drew nature, used colored pencil again, abused graphites, and started to puke out sketch after sketch. of different media and work. Maybe I am back to my old speed again. Maybe soon I will be ready to paint big things again.

What I realized though, is that my art is something that I do for myself. I love when I share my art but art as a career is not for me- at least not right now. I cant think of art as a job. It ruins it. It kills my mojo. But if i start doing it as something I love, then it becomes beautiful to me. It has meaning and purpose and that is something that I need to keep in my work.

I cant work with authors breathing down my neck, but I can illustrate my own book. I dont like to commission things I do not have passion for. I don’t want to be a cookie cutter artist. i want to build and study and explore and be me. I am still healing. I am still recovering from the void of artblock

I am still scared of starting a big work.I am afraid to commit. Perhaps next month?

Published by

marikit

This is Marikit's Sketchpage filled with WIPs, Finished work, doodles, scribbles about my original ideas, fanart and more from this self-taught artist. Marikit is a self-taught artist learning more about art and the world around her.

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